Tuesday, June 5, 2012

“The Truth Shall Set You Free”

“It’s not what we say out loud that really determines our lives. It’s what we whisper to ourselves that has the most power” by Anonymous.  

There are going to be some people who will not like me much after reading this post but I am hoping that there will also be people who understand that the truth, although painful sometimes, will indeed set you free.  Not only will it set you free but it will save your life.  What I am talking about is FAT people.  Yes I said that terrible word; that politically and socially incorrect word in describing people who are extraordinarily large.  In some people’s mind that makes me a horrible person with no feelings and no soul.  Just plain mean.  Someone posted these exact sentiments about me on Facebook.  In fact that’s why I decided to post about the state of being FAT and the painful truth. 

Ok, Ok I need to give you the back story.  A friend of mine posted this picture one day and a whole lot of people commented in various non-flattery ways about her size and let’s just say her outrageous outfit.  I also commented, basically saying something to the effect that the woman in question was really huge and had really bad taste in clothes.  All of a sudden other folks came out of the woodwork to let me know in no uncertain terms that I was the most terrible person on the planet because I was discriminating against larger women.  I had to think about this for a moment and examine myself and my true nature.  Was I really that much of a bigot?  I didn’t see how I could be since I was also overweight.  True enough I am in the process of trying to lose weight and has had significant success but the fact remains that my body fat of 28.3% is just a little bit under what is considered obese.  It was probably not a good idea to make fun of someone but it is also not a good idea to coddle a person and not tell it like it is.  In our society today we are all so scared of sounding politically or socially incorrect that we invent very creative ways to describe a situation or a person.  The entire American society has found ways to make being FAT not only acceptable but even beautiful.  We have television reality shows glorifying fat people and their antics.  We have magazines glorifying being big such as BBW (Big Beautiful Women). We have clothing catalogs called “Big & Beautiful”.  We use “Queen” to designate large size panty hose.  Stores that call their clothes “Plus Size” instead of extra-large. The list goes on and on all the while people are getting larger and larger; I mean fatter and fatter.   And all the diseases associated with obesity, heart disease, diabetes, strokes, etc. have become epidemic.  Why are we not telling the plain and painful truth which is …. Being fat is not beautiful.  Being fat is not healthy.  Being fat is a sure way to get a myriad of chronic diseases that cause you to have a terrible quality of life when you get older and will shorten your life.  There is nothing good about not being able to do the simplest things in life such as running if you had to, or bending over to tie your shoes or going up the stairs without having to stop to catch your breath or being able play energetically with your children.  All of these things and so much more is what the human body was designed for.  Being fat robs you of these simple abilities.  What is good about that?

How about as a society we tell the truth for once and look the problem in face as it really is.  There is one thing that I absolutely know and that is you can’t fix a problem if you don’t first admit there is a problem.  I can absolutely relate to how painful it is to acknowledge that I was obese.  I tried to shut out the voice inside of me, the voice that was whispering the truth to me.  Believe me I understand as much as anyone how easy it is to pretend that I didn’t have a problem.  I understand as much as anyone how desperately I wanted to believe that I wasn’t really that fat; that I was just a little overweight and that I still looked good. 
And here is the proof. 

See, even I can wear something so completely inappropriate for my weight and look like a fool.  I just wished that someone had pulled me aside and told me the truth.  I looked hideous. I wished that my husband would have said to me “sweetheart, you know that I love you but I really feel that you need to rethink that outfit”.  Yes it would have hurt for a minute but it would have given me the kick that I needed to face the truth, the wake up call a little sooner to do something about my FAT. I don’t blame my husband; he didn’t want to hurt my feelings.  My FAT is MY responsibility.  However, we as a society are NOT doing anyone any favors by coddling their feelings on this matter.  We have to find ways to convey how important it is for them to not only do it to look better but to do it to get healthier.  That is the role that we can play and should play.  If we don't do this the people we care about will fall to diseases of obesity and they and us will have to pay for the associated medical cost either directly or indirectly.  The people on Facebook who criticized me about being mean saying that they didn’t believe that I had the guts to tell someone to their face about their size.  Well I do have the guts.  I have a couple of good friends who I gently but firmly told them that they needed to do something because they were getting too large to be healthy.  Their reaction at first was one of hurt but then they realized that I told them because I cared about them.  Both have taken action and have started on their own journey toward fitness.  I know that what I said was not the only catalyst that started them but it played a part.  Ultimately the responsibility lies with the person who needs to change but our responsibility as friends, family and society is to tell the truth and to encourage.  There is no denying that the Truth Will Set You Free to be the person that you know you can be.




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